Q: My mother has always had this vision that I would wear her wedding dress when it came time for me to get married. This however is not what I envisioned. Her dress is beautiful and timeless, but just not my style. I don’t want to hurt her feelings but I don’t know how to approach the situation without feeling like I’m crushing her dream.
A: It sounds to me that you have quite a few options to consider. It’s perfectly fine that you have had another vision in mind than the one your mother has. Because of this, you’re going to have to be upfront with her about your feelings. If thought out fully, you can probably come to a decision that you both feel happy with. Here are some suggestions:
-Bridal Portraits: This is a trend that I’m slowly seeing decline ever since the rise of engagement pictures and trash the dress photo shoots. Bridal portraits are professional pictures taken before the wedding of the bride in bridal garment. They are usually displayed in the entrance of the reception room. If you were to consider doing bridal portraits, wearing your mother’s wedding dress for the photo shoot could be a great way to compromise with her dream.
-Ceremony: The ceremony takes up anywhere from half an hour to a full hour of your wedding day. Determine how comfortable you’ll be wearing your mother’s dress for the ceremony and then changing into your dream dress for your formal portraits and reception.
-Incorporate it into your dress: Perhaps a piece of her dress can be attached to your dream dress, even if it’s just a piece of material in the inside that can count for your “something old”.
-Grandchildren: If in fact you come to the conclusion that wearing your mother’s wedding dress is not what you want to do, see how she would feel about having the dress turned into a blanket for your first child’s christening or baptism.
| Vanessa |